I’d like to say it’s not often that I get irrationally angered by (trivial) things… but I would probably be lying. To be fair I probably do some of these and no doubt feature on some poor strangers equivalent list of “things that irrationally anger me in every day life”.
If you do any of of these things don’t worry, you’re not a shit person and we can probably still be friends. As long as I don’t witness it of course.
1. Adults on scooters
Just unnecessary. I had a discussion last week about what’s worse – a businessman on a scooter or a businessman on a long board. No question – scooter. At least a long board requires some sort of skill and you have some semblance of “cool” even if it is in that sort of weird old uncle way. A business person on roller skates I’d take my hat off to. Those things terrify me and I turn into this
2. People who don’t hold doors
Now this isn’t any sort of feminist/anti feminist thing (that’s a whole post in itself) this is just a general politeness/not-being-a-dick thing. These are the people who walk through a (generally big heavy) door and then just let it go without glancing behind them so see if there’s anyone else there. And generally I’m paying about as much attention as they are while playing on my phone (ahem, see number 3) which equals door slamming in face.
3. People who obliviously wander along using their phone in public
Look up, enjoy the world around you, smell the roses and all those cliches. Don’t make me navigate around your meandering self. In the interests of full disclosure, I am writing this on my phone as I walk down Lambton quay. I have seen 3 dirty looks directed my way. I hate myself
4. Those people who haven’t got the hang of rush hour traffic (or not being a total jerk-face)
Great, go ahead and drive the whole way up to the end of the merging lane before suddenly forcing your way in, even though everyone else has spent their time in the merging lane doing what it was designed for (hint: it’s in the name, and it rhymes with verging, as in “I’m verging on road rage just thinking about this”)
5. People who push into lifts
You know what I mean, you’re in a full lift when someone (there’s generally a type, we don’t need to go into detail) is like “oh ho ho room for one more” and proceeds to push their way in even though there was certainly not room for one more. If like me, you are on the shorter side of the growth spectrum, you’ll sympathise with the resulting armpit to nose proximity. I can attest to the fact that not everyone in Wellington CBD understands the importance of deodorant.
Given that I’ve just written this whole thing on my iPhone, I have discovered one more gripe… how ducking ship has predictive text on iOS 8 got?! Again, this may be fodder for a whole new post…
What do you think, do any of these induce “Hulk Smash” levels of rage in you?
Try the SwiftKey app for iOS. Changed my life